Mrs BC's House of Chaos: Today was not a great day.

It was very hot - too hot to be out at the beach or even in the garden. The 50 things to do in the school holiday post mocks me in my humidity induced lack of motivation. Our budget is too tight right now for any sort of diversionary tactics. The boys where bored & in an endless loop of 'antagonise-whinge-escalate' that seems to plague our house every school holidays, despite my best intentions. The constancy of this is such that I can't rub 2 thoughts together in my head - I literally forget what I walked into a room for. I hate feeling so diconnected, so frazzled, so fed up with my kids. Mr BC is back at work so I cannot escape even if I wanted to. Unluckily for him, he works from home most of the time so gets to listen to my whinging in person.

I just need to go & have sushi & read a magazine & have no one talk to me for an hour! I sobbed melodramaticly to Mr BC. I just need to have my head to myself for while! I've been telling you I need some time to myself & I NEED SOME TIME TO MYSELF!!!!

Mr BC hastily checked his calendar, & after some discussion we decided that I could steal $20 from our budget & I could take myself to a sanity break/sushi lunch on Saturday. It's a long time to wait but it's something to look forward to.

I decided that I would get on with some chores, but write myself a list so I wouldn't forget what I was doing. I made Donna Hay's chocolate sorbet recipe, Pioneer Woman's perfect iced coffee recipe, & a batch of Evolution Slice. I did 3 loads of laundry. I cleaned the fishtank & fed the guinea pig. I went through my inbox files to delete anything that could be dragging down the speed of my laptop.....

Wow, 153 items in my Junk Mail File, that's a lot..... I try & check it every couple weeks, I'd left it for 4. There where quite a few emails from 'Foreign Department, Africa' asking me to help them move a few billion out of thier country. Lots of emails telling me I had won the lottery, & apparently I might have been selected to win an ipad at least 7 times.

delete, delete, delete.

I felt a bit of a sinking feeling when I noticed there where several emails from people leaving comments on my blog, despite the fact emails from these particular guys are not normally junked. This sucked, because I really like to reply personally to each comment via email within 24 hours at most.

Then I found an email from a fellow blogger telling me I had won a $200 Coles Myer Voucher! My heart sank when I realised this email was almost 4 weeks old, because the blogger would be well within her rights to a redraw if I hadn't claimed, & until today, I hadn't. (I haven't heard back from her yet). Stupid Outlook.

If you are like me you enter a lot of competitions in blog land, & you'll be especially like me if you don't keep track of them. I clicked over to the blog in question to see what competition I had actually won. I had to leave a comment telling how I was leading a healthier life. This is my answer.

It's a struggle, this trying to be healthy, but I'm sure it's worth it. For me it's portion size, carb quality & excercise. Lately I think mental health is also part of the bigger picture of 'being healthy' - take time to laugh, relax, & spend time with my loved ones. And try try try for quality time to myself!
x

Words to fucking live by. Pass the tissues.

xx