Today while walking I spotted the peaceful yoga-ers, stretching & such, under their tree. Mental note to self = Must sign up for that soon, keep walking. Notice that one of the yoga group has bought a small child along, to add to the peaceful serentity of the beachside yoga experience. Child is adorable, & has his own mat. He looks about 18 months old, the perfect age to sit quietly & not cause any annoying distraction.....No fucking way!! Erase previous mental note. Find different yoga class.
I am enjoying the walking, still going 4 times per week. I am increasing the distance I walk, soon I will add intensity with some hills. Bloody hell it's making me hungry. I must be ready to Zhumba. Or my arse is. Well not atually my arse, that is disapearing. It is doing that middle age man thing of migrating around to my tummy. So now I have that no arse, fat gut look. *sigh* I don't even like beer, and soon I'll have man boobs. What do you call man boobs on a woman? You can't call them chesticles, or moobs, or man-cans. Lady bumps? How about just boobs? Actually my boobs are still as spectacular as ever, even if they have breastfed 3 children, including the youngest who was almost the boy who would not wean. OK, OK, they are a bit less than perky but they've earned their rest haven't they?
If men have so many delightful names for their tired bits, what do they call their stomachs? What do I, who has carried & ceasared 3 children with it, call mine? I don't have a six pack, I've got the whole keg? My friend calls her's a 'sloppy tummy'...which doesn't sit right with me, and neither does my tummy.
After baby number 3 (who was quite large) was born, my stomach muscles separated. And then divorced. And then one side just went awol & completely ripped away from my pubic bone, leaving the other one to be a single stomach muscle & do all the work without any help...hang on, what was this post about? Focus, Mrs BC!
Apparently this is quite common, & explains why so many mummy's have mummy tummys. Well I don't like it. I want it gone. I think I will start a surgery fund - they have the technology, they CAN rebuild it. Would you like to donate? Good, I'll start a paypal account.
Bionic Belly, here I come.
Labels: Chaos notes