Life Lessons

At school where taught some amazingly irrelevant things;

• Leisure Studies - because apparently in the future, everything would be so automated that we would have an abundance of leisure hours, and we should know how to manage that properly.
• How to make a salad roll. Wearing an apron.

Inadvertently, I learned a few things besides the curricula;

• Pick your battles. Even if you are right, don't take on the school bully, especially when surrounded by her aggressive clique. You can be smugly right and uninjured, it's OK.
• If your language teacher swears at the students, the right thing to do is speak up, even if no one believes you. 
• How to smoke cigarettes without getting caught (most of the time).
• Obstacle courses and Dodge Ball really are metaphors for life, it is better to participate than sit on the bench because it is 'that time of the month'.

I wish I had learned the following skills, but instead have had to learn them the hard way, in real life situations.

• Smoking Cigarettes is ruinous to your health, especially if you are prone to asthma.
• How to budget and manage money. This is a work in progress, and the exams are constant. Learning about compound interest is all well and good, but where was the lesson on making $25 pay for groceries for a week? 
• Self Defense. Why is this not taught at school? It would be so much handier than ice skating.
• Relationships 101. Many adults still do not have the basics, and high schoolers need it more than anyone. Results are great, but relationships are king.
• Comparative Religion. I find this such an interesting subject, but when I was at school, you where Catholic or Anglican. I think things have changed, thank the goddess.
• Real Estate Basics. You either buy or rent, and both have quite detailed steps and hidden tricks. These lessons are expensive to learn later in life.

I think the most important lesson I learned was this - The world is wide and wonderful place, nothing like the crap you learned in Social Studies or the options you where given for Work Experience.

What pearls of wisdom did you have to learn the hard way? (Was is smoking cigarettes behind the incinerator? Because that totally works.)

I am not the asshole whisperer

Blog every day in May Challenge - Day 24 My top 3 worst traits. *Sigh* Yes, yes; you can stop laughing now! We all know there are way more than 3!

I cannot lie. 
I just cannot. I am exceedingly honest. I can be diplomatic, but not if it feels false. I can smooth something over to avoid hurting someones feelings, but generally I need to tell it like it is. If I am angry or enthusiastic then all bets are off. I had one boss tell me I had 'nosebleed communication' i.e. - I gave myself a nosebleed getting my point across with a figurative headbutt. He was right, but then he was also a c**nt, as I told him at the office Christmas party. (Burning the bridges, lighting the way!) On the plus side - I am genuine, to a fault. If you ask my opinion you are guaranteed to get it. Also, I will probably respect you enough to tell you the truth, so be careful what you ask.

I do not forgive easily
This is a character trait that I feel bad about and often think about fixing, but never actually do. I would like to be one of those calm, accepting, imagine-the-other-person's pain type of people, and in truth I'm generally a very loyal and understanding friend; but if you cross me enough or betray me I will cut you out of my life and that will be that. Yes, I have been called a princess in an ivory tower, but you know what? Solitude is better than bad company and I would rather put energy into myself or people who I can rely on than spend time trying to fix someone elses faults. I'm not the asshole whisperer and I have no tolerance for bullshit. I've read that the act of forgiving is to free yourself, but in all honesty I think it is better to free my life of bad people, and I am OK with that point of view. What do you mean life is too short? Too short to put up with other peoples shit, I think you mean.

I find it hard to give up.
I never say die - and no, I am not the Energizer bunny. (I wish!) I sometimes think I have too much perseverance. Too much dogged determination. Once, a client told me I was like a dog with a bone, in that I just wouldn't give up. At the time, I took it as a compliment, but I think it is healthier to not flog a dead horse. Just say You know what? I gave it a good go, but I am done. I can do nothing more here, I am wasting my energy in this situation. But there is just something in me that keeps going and going and going, long after reasonable people have thrown in the towel. For example, we are not planning on moving, but I would feel like a failure if we sold this house without completing all of the renovations we have planned. Even if I won the lottery, I might buy another house but I would continue the renovations here. Crazy huh? I think it is better to pick your battles and walk away, and it is something I am actively trying to do.

So what is the verdict? Do you think I am a sociopath or do you have some worse traits to share? >insert evil laugh here<
xx

Move it ALONG

I like forward motion. I don't like for things to sit still, which is ironic, because I myself certainly like to sit still. I always think it is because I am an Aries (the sign of ACTION!), but I think it is just because I am human that I get antsy when plans don't hustle along the way they are supposed to. I am really really really fed up with waiting for the following plans to roll out.

Kitchen Update 

Me too, darling. 

Two things are eating away at my sanity when it comes to this kitchen - the colour, and the size. When we moved in, almost all of the upstairs walls where painted this colour, with carpet to match. Very dirty, and truly hideous. Hours and hours of painting and carpet ripping, and we are still not enjoying a green kitchen. We have updated the appliances and have an extraction fan to fit over the stove, once we get rid of those overhead cupboards. We attempted to paint the bottom cupboard doors white, but are not at all happy with the result, so will replace them when we replace the pantry. (we wanted to put the fridge in there and are 2.5 cm to short, unless we cut into the supporting, load-bearing studs. Erm, no) The disgusting green bench top refuses to die but I have big plans to encase it in stainless steel, bwahaha! The back splash is going to be clean, white subway tile, and there will be a bank of glass front cupboards over the bench on the left side. I can't change the size of it; despite hours spent discussing pushing walls out, there just isn't enough room unless we extend out. And if we are struggling to do this little series of steps, I cannot imagine what it will take to get that done.

Adding a deck to the house

Before via the side of my house.  Dream deck via

We have a covered area on the east side of the house, and it is the perfect place for a deck. My dream is to knock out the lounge room wall and replace it with french doors leading to a a covered deck with privacy slats that are high enough to hide the bogan neighbours, but open at the top to allow the bay breezes to enter and cool down the house in summer. There is a nice tropical green outlook from the front and the back, and it would be the perfect spot to eat dinner in the warmer months. This has been my dream for a while, and I struggle every day that it is not yet a reality. The supports are there but the structure would need some adjusting before it would be up to building code for decks. Once the deck was done we could fix that stupid guttering. 

Getting the car fixed

Mad photoshop paint skillz

A while ago, the starter engine broke in our car. Because it will cost about $1300 to replace, we have been making do with putting the car in gear and touching a wire to the battery. This works really well; so well, in fact, that a few years later we are still using this solution, but not happily. For all intensive purposes it looks like I am hot wiring the car, except according to Google, the way to hot wire a car is not under the hood but through the casing underneath the steering wheel.  (I Googled hot wiring a car to get this image I swear!) The car has other issues (broken stereo, no hubcaps, could really do with a clean..) but popping the bonnet every time I need to start the car is something I am really struggling with. About once a week someone will give me an odd look or ask if I am stealing the car, to which I reply "It's OK, I saw it on Pinterest!" I mentioned to a friend that I was so over this situation, to which she laughed and said 'It's awesome! You aren't embarrassed or anything!" Sigh.

Buying some rural property

via

It is my dream to live in the country, I think about it all the time. Not being able to see (or hear) the neighbours, having enough room to grow a decent amount of vegetables, being able to plant fruit trees as well as monsters like Avocado and Mulberry, keep chickens, raise some pork and beef for our own freezer, have some goats and sheep and maybe a cow or two to milk. Breathing fresh unpolluted air while looking at beautiful scenery. Yes, this does sound like some city girls ideal of a countryside resort farm stay; but I wouldn't mind the mud and the wood chopping and the animal husbandry. I already look after monkeys all day and they would be happier if they had acres to galoot and adventure in. Sadly, Mr BC (who was exposed to the farming life as a child) does not share my enthusiasm at all. You'd think I had asked him to give up fishing. My ideal also includes internet access obviously, and the beach within reasonable distance. And a pool, and eventually a tennis court. Maybe if we started off with a weekender, and eventually just moved into it, it wouldn't be such a step for him. I will make it happen, but it is taking a while.

I keep thinking that we just need more motivation to get things moving, but the reality is that these projects are being held up by lack of money and/or lack of time, and obviously those are the real issues I am struggling with. There has to be a way forward! I wish I knew what that was, because willing it to happen isn't working!

Is time and money holding you back from anything? Do tell, so I can stop feeling so bad about it!

xx
Linking to IBOT

A few of my favourite things.

Well, a few of my favourite posts from this blog.

Enjoy!

Home Hairdressing Horror

The Valley Rattler, a family adventure

Monkey Logic

Parenting Pop Quiz

Mermaid

Advice for dealing with Arseholes

My ode to not camping

Pause for a Moment

House Obsession

Local Deli

Take 5 Blogs

These are 5 blogs I am crushing on right now.

Better After 
This is a round up of the best before and after DIYs on the internet, I could spend hours here. I've been inspired more often than not, and there is always something to laugh at.

Penelope Trunk
I love her no bullshit approach to career and life advice, and I love that she flies the flag for Aspergers with such attitude. There is always something to learn from her.

The Nester
I think this is quite possibly my new favourite decor blog. I love that she has 3 children, a dog and doesn't like to spend money; and still has a beautiful house. I feel I have much to learn.

Phoodie
Recently named one of Mamamia's most clickable women, and I can see why. This blog is beautiful, delicious and arty. I love it.

Slapdash Mama
Slappy's brand of mental is hysterical yet somehow makes me feel we might be related. She cracks me up! Also she has the best name ever. Slappy.

xx

Dealing with my diabetic lot in life.

Today (day 16) the blog every day in May challenge is to discuss 'something difficult about your lot in life and how you're working to overcome it'.

Truth be told, I don't like talking about my problems, any of my close friends will tell you that. There are issues that I have taken the power out of by talking about them, but this is not the place for that, for they are not my stories to tell outside the confines of some trusted friends and family. Something I have shared here is how I am dealing with having diabetes type 2, you can read a rant here and also the rant where I fired my doctor here.

Health is a bit of a boring subject so I will update 'the diabetes situation' in bullet form, for your viewing pleasure. I'm always thinking of you guys! First few points are recaps. Pay attention.

• Diabetes type 1 and 2 are both prevalent in my family tree. I am lucky not to have type 1.
• My family tree has Irish roots so my body type resembles a potato. I am not too tall and yes, I am overweight but not massively so; and in any case I have not spent years sitting on the couch eating pizza. (the occasional night, sure). It is what it is.
• I don't think I or anyone else deserve to have diabetes, but you have to deal with the cards you've got. I can't ignore it on the premise that I think I shouldn't have it. It is what it is.

End of recap! 

This is how I am dealing with my diabetic lot in life.

• I advocate for my own health. Obviously I have a doctor, but I make it my business to research the drugs I need to take, the foods I should and shouldn't eat, I ask questions and seek out extra professionals when I think I need them. I take responsibility for my own health and do not passively accept everything I am told.
• I take the medication I am supposed to take, when I am supposed to take it. Insulin is not vitamins (although I take them too) you cannot just forget to take it. There will be consequences. I also do blood tests when I am supposed to (finger pricks 6 times a day and the big fasting blood test every 3 or so months). I'm getting better about not complaining. 
• I am trying to eat less dense carbs, such as bread, pasta, rice, corn, potatoes and sweet potato. Not eating them really keeps my blood sugar down. I really like the Paleo diet (which does not exclude potatoes and sweet potato) but when I ate this way I was very tired all the time, which is not great for me at all, I am a busy mum and need energy! I cannot find a dietitian that has even heard of Paleo that is also able to guide me through it from a diabetic point of view, so I am reading up on the internet and experimenting myself. I use a lot of Paleo recipes, and mostly say no to refined sugars or things like fruit juice.
• I exercise for weight loss and also to maintain fitness and good circulation. I'm waiting on a hernia operation and until then I can't do any bending, stretching, twisting or upper body strength. I find this particularly frustrating because A, I want to do martial art/yoga/zumba/cross fit/Tough Mudder Marathons and B, I need to lose weight to lessen the impact of diabetes, and if I cannot exercise properly I cannot lose weight. I can walk, however, so I walk about 90 minutes most days. 
• I have cut way down on alcohol. It's tragic, I know >sad face<. I have found that one of the tablets I take works a lot better if I have a small glass of wine every day, and this also has the added benefits of antioxidants so that was pretty exciting news! I still have the occasional gin and tonic or cocktail, but that is it. No super big nights out for me any more. 

So that is how I deal with the reality of having diabetes type 2. It's just about taking responsibility for yourself, and getting on with it!

xx

A day in my life

Lots of work to do today

Procrastination beading! Pretty..

Giddy up. 

Caterpillars, prepare to meet your doom.

Geeze, Louise these Gooseberrys are taking forever to ripen.

These are being donated to charity, there is no way I will make that much jam. Put them in the car  immediately.

No, you are fine in the doorway Kora, really. Don't move darling.

Quickly before school finishes..

School pick up time!

Soup for dinner

Beans are not ready. Hmm, Rosemary..

Cheesy Damper and Olive Damper. 

So soothing.